Taking my Social Anxiety out to play.

Social Anxiety.

So I'm a gamer. It's like being a sports fan only my sport is board games, table top role playing games, live action role playing games, and multi player online role playing games. Desk top computer games. . . so most games.  Kinda like the sports fan who likes basketball, hockey, football, soccer, tennis, bowling . . .because sports are fun.

The thing about being a gamer for me is that single player games, like solitaire, and computer games are less fun for me than social gaming.

But social gaming means bringing my depression and anxiety with me in front of other people. I feel like others have to be able to see my cracks, and open wounds. I feel like I'm going to let people down and I feel like they don't like me anyway.

The train of suck gets bonus miles to run me down in social situations.

But I want to be social. I want to game. While gaming my depression and anxiety are easier to ignore. Till the game is over. Then bang! "You sucked. No one really had any fun." These are the lies of the train of suck.

The trick is that when you k ow your anxiety is loud inside you, take a moment. Trust your friends. If they aren't having a good time because of you let them come to you and tell you. Trust them over your own feelings, because you already know how you're feeling is being colored by Depression and Anxiety.

Ask yourself, was it bad? No? Then it was good.

I try complimenting another player. It helps shift my mental focus off me and what I might have done wrong to them and what they did right.

Step back and replenish if you need to.

Social anxiety doesn't have to control you.  Remind the train of suck that your not a mind reader, trust your friends,  take time time-outs as needed. You got this.